As I was scrolling through my newsfeed on Facebook this morning I came across a site that listed the symptoms of Aspergers. So I thought since its been more than two years since I last blogged about my progress as an adult with Aspergers, I thought I would today.
1. Failure to Develop Friendships
This is going to make me sound like I’m a bit up myself but I’ve had a number of people tell me that they don’t know anyone who doesn’t like me. I am good at getting along with people. I find it hard to make enemies.
But in saying that I’m terrible at maintaining friendships. I’ve noticed this since moving to Sydney. In Dubbo I saw the same people all the time at church, at school and work so I didn’t need to make an effort with friendships.
I must admit that many of those friends in Dubbo I barely speak to now. I didn’t make the effort – but to be fair many of my Dubbo friends didn’t make an effort either. This made me realise that real friendships take effort and energy that I just don’t possess. I like my own company too much. Also being married takes a lot of energy haha
2. Selective Mutism
When I was a kid I did this a fair bit in school. I always scored low in class participation in my school reports.
Fast forward to today, just ask my husband and he will tell you that he probably wishes I had selective mutism haha.
3. Inability to Empathize
There were times as a kid that I wasn’t so great with empathy. Now though, (as I have mentioned in previous posts and Facebook statuses) I believe that I empathise deeply but I’m not always great at expressing empathy. I can come across as blunt and uncaring. My immediate reactions came sometimes be inappropriate but I can often articulate my feelings more accurately later on – usually in writing. I just process such things a little slower.
4. Unable to Make Eye Contact or Forcing Eye Contact
I’m better with eye contact as an adult. I do force myself when I’m at work serving customers so I may come across a little forced and awkward but I don’t know for sure.
Some days though it’s all too hard and I stare at the floor. But I have less and less days like that.
5. Social Awkwardness
I didn’t choose the socially awkward life, the socially awkward life chose me.
6. Narrowed Interests
As I’ve talked about in a previous post I tend to go through periods of intense obsession with certain topics or people rather than just the one narrow interest.
7. Sticking to Routine
Routine has always been a great help to me. Part of why I like to do the admin work for my husband’s teaching is so I know what the routine is. I know who has lessons when. I build the rest of my routine around that. Having a routine at home helps since my supermarket job can be a bit all over the place in terms of shifts. Over the years I’ve become so used to being called in to work last minute that it rarely makes me stressed.
8. Literal Interpretations
I can pick up on sarcasm – I don’t think I’ve ever struggled with that. I am however very gullible. I take everything pretty seriously.
9. Excellent Pattern Recognition
I don’t know about that. I guess being a musician I pick up musical patterns.
10. Poor Motor Skills
My poor motor skills is my most obvious indication of Aspergers. It has slowly improved over time but I can still barely sew, I can’t catch, I have terrible handwriting and I can trip over flat surfaces.
It was odd that the web page didn’t mention sensory sensitivity or meltdowns – I thought they would be major indicators but what would I know. Here’s the page.
So there you go. An update on my progress. I’m still an Aspie and I still think of it more like a superpower. The positives far outweigh the negatives. I often laugh the negatives off. I’m used to my weirdness. I’m not so self conscious about it.